A Reflective Moment

When I was younger, I was full of self-doubt. I was always the littlest boy in my age group. I was always made to feel insignificant to my peers. And I bought into that. It wasn't until I was in high school that the seed of power was planted into my psyche. And it wasn't until I was in my mid twenties that I fully realized who I was and the power I had. I carried that power with me into my mid thirties.

And then I had my last relationship. Shame on me for giving that power to someone else. Because I allowed him to break me down. I've lost that swagger, that confidence I had in myself. I find myself questioning myself at almost every turn. I compare myself against other people and find myself lacking.

I hate it. I hate what I've become.

It's going to take some time to find that strength again. And when I do, I'll never give it to anyone else again.